Why C-section Mums are Badass

Why C-section Mums are Badass

Remember, if you had a c-section, you're badass. When I posted the picture below on Instagram for the first time, a couple of years ago (and a year or so after my c-section), my friend Lisa told me so.

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Clio and her badass c-section scar.

 

Being told I was badass for having a c-section was a new concept to me. I’m not judgemental in motherhood (as I hope you know from the &Breathe ethos) but there is something around the cultural rhetoric of c-sections that means mothers still carry a bit of shame around having one.

I experienced birth trauma with my first birth, so when it came time to have my second, many years later, I chose to have c section. It was the right choice for me, and it wasn’t taken lightly.

But when I told people I was having an elective c section, responses were not all positive. A fellow school mum said “Oh I didn’t realise you could just ask for a c section” - which, despite not knowing my birth history, made me feel like it was a luxury option I wasn’t worthy of. A family member questioned whether I needed one - they had never understood the mental impact (severe postnatal depression and mild PTSD) after my first birth .

Comments like this upset me at a time when I was terrified and anxious anyway, so it didn’t help my birth preparation.

Society perceives c-sections as the easy option (remember the media phrase ‘too posh to push?’) and can invalidate it versus a ‘natural’ birth. In fact a vaginal birth recovery can be much shorter and easier than c-section recovery. A c-section is major abdominal surgery cutting through seven different layers of tissue. And we’re expected to get up and go home just 24 hours later - and look after a tiny, screaming, human being too.

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So remember:

It's not a cheat. It's not an easy way out. It doesn't make you any less of a mum. It doesn't mean you didn't try. It doesn't mean you don't have an actual birthing day. People who say those things don’t know any better. And your baby will be just as healthy as their mate who came out of a vagina.

I wrote an article all about my c-section decision and the reactions to it for The Telegraph a few years ago. Click HERE to read it (it’s behind a paywall, but you can sign up for three free articles per month).

And if you need something to say to those judgemental whispers about your birthing decision - tell them, and yourself, you’re a badass, no matter how your baby comes in to this world. And that your decision is none of their bloody business, actually.

Are you struggling with feeling judged in motherhood or disconnected from your identity after your birth? Drop me a DM on Insta.

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