Top 3 Things to consider when you’re returning to work.
Having a baby can be fraught, loving, surprising and sleep-depriving. And just when you’re getting a handle on things (or maybe even before that) you have to go back to work.
So how best to handle it? Olivia Bath, Founder of The Women’s Vault shares her top three tips for making the mental transition back to work.
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Olivia Bath
Returning to work after maternity leave is the second biggest transition you’ll make after becoming a parent. In the weeks leading up to returning to work, you may be filled with a mix of emotions - from excitement at the prospect of intellectual stimulation and getting some of “your old” self back - to anxiety with the thought of leaving your baby and being ridden with “Mum guilt”.
There are many things you can do to help you manage this transition, mentally, physically and emotionally. Here’s a fantastic place to start:
1) Establish your boundaries
When you become a Mum, your boundaries become blurred and things that you never thought you’d do - like going to the loo with your child on your lap - becomes an everyday occurrence.
Before going back to work, take the time to write out your boundaries, including what you will and won’t do. For example, will you check and respond to emails or calls on your day off? Will you attend meetings after you’ve collected your child from nursery? Will you agree to working late when a client needs your help urgently?
The act of setting boundaries is intertwined with your resilience. It’s a way of helping you to take care of yourself and show your self-worth. You create valuable head space, reducing the feeling of “mental overload” or being drained of energy.
Don’t forget that boundaries can be flexible too. You can use language like: “As a rule, I don’t usually work late as I collect my child from nursery. My family is my highest priority and so I can’t commit to dropping everything whenever urgent things come up, however, I’m willing to for this occasion.”
This puts YOU in the driving seat. It shows that you have clarity on your highest priority, are willing to go the extra mile for your job and that you’ve got the power to decide when you can be flexible on your boundaries.
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2) Talk to Others
Take the opportunity to have a cup of tea and a chat with some family members or friends who have older children and have been back at work for a year or more. Your peers often have valuable advice if you’re open and honest with your questions, despite the polished veneer!
Ask them about their return to work experience and what they’d change with hindsight; what they love about being a professional parent and importantly, what they do for their resilience and self-care each week. You can also ask them about how they “juggle” family and work life, as well as time for themselves, and what they do to create balance between these.
Don’t worry about looking silly if you want to take some notes and refer back to these the week before you start back at work - it can be easy to forget these conversations in the rush of office life and new deadlines.
“Setting boundaries is intertwined with your resilience. It’s a way of helping you to take care of yourself and show your self-worth.”
3) Read your company’s annual report
Putting in the time and effort to read up on your company’s performance and strategic plans is a couple of hours well spent.
This will start to shift your awareness and subconscious to your job and the company you work for, rather than baby sick, resulting in a broader mental adjustment of returning to work.
I recommend doing this before you speak with your manager and you can share what you’ve learned and also ask about any changes in your division and team. All of this will be useful so that you can hit the ground running when you start back at work.
Olivia and her little one!
Olivia is the CEO and Founder of the Women’s Vault, which helps professional, first-time Mums return to work from maternity leave so they can balance the joys of motherhood and continue to build their career.
Learn more: www.thewomensvault.com | FB | IG
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